There is no age to fall in love. While some, married young, celebrate their golden or even diamond wedding anniversary, others less happy in their past relationships or who unfortunately find themselves widowed, fall in love again as when they were twenty years old, even at an advanced age. Moreover, with longer life expectancy and older people who feel young and wish to remain so physically, retirement age can for many be like the opening of a new chapter in their life. life rather than its epilogue.
More active and in better physical shape than their predecessors, comfortable with digital tools and dating platforms, today's seniors therefore have more opportunities to meet new people and therefore, why not, to fall back lover. So, divorced, widowed, or simply lifelong single, some seniors settle down but why not choose (re)marriage after their 60s and even 70s?
Retirement is a vector of change and, for many, readjustments. Some see it as an opportunity to start a new stage in their lives. This can therefore mean (re) falling in love, but also… divorce, even after decades of marriage! Retirement is a bit like those horoscopes that promise radical changes, because this or that planet has entered a particular position. With the evolution of mores, we no longer force ourselves to stay in an unhappy union. Marriage has become secularized and desacralized, which has greatly democratized it, including among the elderly. However, if we separate more easily after a certain age today than in the past, we also remarry more often.
And it's not because you're retired that your social life stops, quite the contrary! For many of them, there are still at least twenty years to go before they really belong to the third age, and a certain social imperative is felt. If it is quite possible to flourish in your social circle alone, some will therefore naturally want to start this new chapter of their life accompanied. It will still be necessary to manage to get rid of the taboos which, again and again, accompany questions of love and sexuality among our elders!
The question of marriage, and particularly remarriage, can sometimes surprise those around you, especially children. The person concerned would be too old to remarry, it would also in some way violate the memory of the deceased spouse in the case of widowed people, or too soon after a divorce perceived as still fresh, and so on... although they tend to dissipate, there are still many taboos between age on the one hand, and love, sexuality, and therefore marriage on the other. These are particularly vivid in the case of couples who are formed in a retirement home, the loss of autonomy being assimilated to a loss of free will, and therefore question the sincerity of the feelings felt, and the possibility of a rash decision.
However, when one marries at this age, it is precisely for oneself, and not to respond to a certain social pressure, that of the nuclear family for example. It is therefore to be hoped that the children and loved ones will eventually understand this decision and see it in a positive light, if that was not already the case immediately, and make sure to convince them and remind them that this decision belongs above all to the first concerned. After all, this new marriage also makes it possible to fight against certain scourges of age, such as loneliness and loss of autonomy. It's always better when faced with two than alone. It is therefore necessary to remind his loved ones that regardless of his age, his own happiness and well-being come first. We too often tend to define the elderly by their age, as if that were their only characteristic. This can be a challenge, but it is up to them to show those around them that they are still human beings with their desires and desires, and to defend their right to choose.
It would already seem that remarriage contributes to a higher level of life satisfaction among our elders, whether it follows a divorce or widowhood. Indeed, in the first case, divorce does not necessarily imply disillusionment with the institution of marriage itself, which therefore does not exclude a new attempt; while in the second, remarriage can alleviate the pain caused by the loss of a loved one, which also greatly increases the occurrences of depression, illness, mortality and suicide attempts. Remarriage would then be a strategy put in place to cope with the pain caused by widowhood, and relatively few people would then knowingly intend to be celibate, still seeing marriage as something desirable - provided they find the right person. .
In fact, that's the beauty of a late marriage. It no longer responds to the same social and family imperatives as among the youngest. This second (or more!) marriage is carried out for oneself above all. When we get married after 60, it is not because we feel obliged to lock ourselves into shackles. On the contrary, it may even be to free oneself from it, since we have said it, the taboos around this type of marriage persist. It is therefore a more symbolic marriage, since it consecrates a couple and not a family, which it is no longer possible to found at this age.
Thus, seniors would be more demanding in the choice of their new partner. This would express a fairly gendered dynamic, men being more inclined to remarry than women, who after a life sometimes spent at home or in any case in charge of domestic work, no longer want to deck themselves out with a husband. which must be taken care of. This is also explained by the greater widowhood among women, between a longer life expectancy and a tendency to have older spouses. However, who says widowhood says survivor's pension of the deceased spouse, which can be compromised by a remarriage. If we sometimes marry younger for economic reasons, these tend to disappear with retirement, and a marriage can therefore even represent a cost.
After a certain age, it's a safe bet that your new partner has also had different experiences, and possibly one or more marriages. This removes some pressure from this act, which can feel much more engaging and definitive when performed younger and for the first time. Moreover, it is no longer a flaw or a handicap to be divorced, at least in most circles, and there is therefore no longer any fear of not finding love once again. in the singles market. A market that represents a real niche, for a plethora of dating sites aimed specifically at the elderly, who are increasingly comfortable with the Internet, whether on their computer or their smartphone. In short, at 20 as at 70, what matters above all is to follow your heart!
