Finally, this sentence will perhaps be the one I have said the most since I became a mother almost 13 and a half years ago.
(with "let me damn it sleep )
(good and "I love you very much my little hearts also)
I was not warned .
That on the day of my deliveries, it is possible that I will not fall in ecstasy in front of my children, but rather in hypoglycemia or fatigue (or both). That the blues is not just a style of music. That babies sleep a lot, but in 10 minute increments.
For example.
I was definitely NOT warned HOW MUCH :
We cry
We are happy
We're crying again
We miss them
We can't take it anymore
We are worried
And…. it's getting worse
So, of course there were those little injunctions "enjoy!" dropped here and there discreetly, all in goodwill of course (it's fashionable), by parents of "older ones". The famous "little children, little worries »
Yeah, when you have your head in poo and not on your pillow for more than 4 hours straight, juggling between CAF paperwork, the nanny and medical appointments (or vice versa)… well, not only do you don't understand what we're talking about, but on top of that you're upset because you have real problems yourself.
Indeed.
I would say both are right. Besides, should we find out who wins?! Because this is not a competition between parents to get the gold medal of the one who has the most worries that I know. There is always worse, there is always better. Norman's response. Even if these damn social networks prove us the opposite every day.
While we leaf through the instagrams smoothed with Mr. Clean (sorry, with black soap) of the instamums which promise us one photo out of 100 that if, if, really with her too it's often a mess (ah?) and that they are also tired (phew)
Well, we shit. But funny. We, the parents of a young teenager.
So. Two school years in college already. Passed like a Concorde, crash included .
I did not think. I was not warned and although I think I belong to the category of "open-minded" people, who know that anything can happen, that you should not drink water from the fountain or sell bear. It's hard. So much.
I no longer recognize her. So, I read a lot about this period, because I didn't experience it that way myself. Because even if I manage to understand how lost we are at these ages, I can't help worrying, looking for solutions, screaming, crying, pissing too. There is no user manual. Exactly like when they were infants.
You discover day by day this wonderful gift of motherhood.
Adolescence included.
You wonder what you did wrong. You wonder why.
Who is this person strictly opposed to who she was...before. Opposed to you too.
You finally find yourself like a kid mumbling in the back of his room "this is so unfair »
Adolescence is a tsunami. Waves of feelings that totally uproot you when you thought you were (finally) well balanced and serene. Fortunately, there are clearings from time to time, flashes of fullness that you catch without wasting a second and that you carefully store at the bottom left in your little mother's heart. Double kisscool effect on the other hand, because you fall again from very high. Emotional lifts.
So, of course, I imagine that EVERYONE (preferred expression of teenagers) does not experience the same thing, at the same time, of the same amplitude. I also know there is worse. And that I'm probably not at the end of the cycle.
But in any case, I suffer a lot from it.
Even if sometimes I come to hate not what she is, but her behavior. Because it "spoils" our family life for us, because it drives us crazy. We are just lost. We do it day by day. We try everything. Test &learn. We don't give up, but maybe we should?
My last reading (My teenager, my battle by Emmanuelle Piquet) allowed me to discover a new angle. I can't wait to digest this and put it into practice. I will tell you about it. Whether it works or not.
