Usually they are quick to act, but sometimes, when they had something else in mind than doing household chores and helping their mother, they sometimes grumble. Then I get answers like:“Right away. I just hit my record. Why me? yaaaaaaa. Pffffffffffff. Maaaaam not now. Yes I heard you. I will soon. Don't be so angry right now. How come that's not necessary at all. Hi, I already did that yesterday. I just agreed to play soccer. Tomorrow." I don't always feel like fighting them.
When I was a teenager, we always had to help at home at my parents' company, or at home. In the absence of a dishwasher, my brothers and I took turns washing dishes, which included drying and tidying up. Doing household chores was quite normal.
I was responsible for the ups and downs in my own bedroom, we also picked up the small groceries and also dusting and vacuuming were part of it. Each day we each had our regular task, chores for children. We did so faithfully, but with fresh reluctance. And when our youngest brother wasn't as fast, we just helped him. There was no discussion with our parents, it just had to happen.
The dish brush and tea towel regularly flew through the kitchen, when there was another sibling feud during the household chores. Yes, we all hated it, but it was part of it, we didn't know any better.
Now that I am a mother of two teenagers myself, I notice that I am not as strict as my parents when it comes to household chores. They have to help, and they do, but not according to a set pattern. Usually I finish them too fast. I resolve to just leave the dirty laundry behind and under their beds, but if I actually start doing the laundry, I'll take it anyway. I know, I'm not consistent about that. I find that really difficult. I notice that it is often self-evident for them that everything in the household has been done. That the fridge is stocked, the laundry is clean and ironed in the cupboard, that the bathroom is clean and the toilets are cleaned.
It is 7:30 in the morning, my husband and eldest son have already left for their work and internship address. Downstairs in the kitchen I find several dirty plates, cutlery and cups on the counter. As it turns out, the dishwasher is still full and they left without emptying it. It makes me very irritated, people automatically think; Tidying up the kitchen will do the next one! At the same time, I realize that it is partly my fault as well. I spoiled them because I take care of many of the household chores.
Our boys don't have as regular tasks as I used to have. The chores they do, my teenagers are fifteen and sixteen years old, are, for example, helping with shopping, vacuuming, emptying the dishwasher (sometimes!) or hoeing the garden on Saturdays. On the one hand, the boys want to be independent, on the other hand, they prefer not to do household chores. Doing chores around the house is boring. But of course that also applies to mothers, they also find it extremely boring!
The conclusion I can draw while typing is that I need to be more consistent. If I tell them to put the laundry in the laundry basket themselves, otherwise it won't get washed, then I should stick with it and not take over. Yes, mothers also have learning points. But preferably in a tidy environment.