When we fall under the spell of a person, it is quickly at the center of our concerns. But then, what happens when the relationship seems to be one-sided? In English, this phenomenon has a name, that of "firedooring", a word that comes from "firedoor", the fire door in VF. Clearly, we make a thousand efforts to get someone's attention without really succeeding in getting it, and the other is generally little (if at all) interested. A widespread but destructive phenomenon… so why do we accept such a situation?
While it is common for both partners to not invest equally in their relationship, it is particularly hurtful when one is the only one who wants to intensify it and the other recedes as one advances. Worse:when the person moves away from us and only comes back if we start to distance themselves or they experience a period of sentimental emptiness. We then become the spare wheel. According to Metro , if we agree to be "firedoored" (we really need to find a French term!!), it is because we lack self-confidence and/or we feel that we does not deserve the person in question, or at least no more love than they give us. This destructive relationship occupies our minds and deprives us of another (and better) meeting, but also leaves bad memories that can block us in the future.
So, we reassure ourselves:we have all (or almost) been there. But as soon as we become aware of it, we move away for good and above all, we do not lose self-confidence, because we are great!
