As a child I emigrated myself and when our children were toddlers and preschoolers we emigrated as a family. But what is it like now, emigrating with children? Here you will find my tips for emigrating with children. Emigrating with children:do or don't? You can read it here.
Emigration is normally not something you decide overnight. Of course, circumstances can force you to leave your country in a hurry. Refugees are a good example of this. Although in their case it is not really emigration, but a flight to a safe place.
Before you emigrate, you should familiarize yourself with the country you have in mind. Important questions that can be discussed, especially if you are going to emigrate with children:
It is advisable to read up on the internet in advance and to join Facebook groups of, for example, Expats. Keep in mind that it makes a big difference whether your work sends you somewhere or whether you personally choose to emigrate. In the first case everything is provided, in the second case you have to take care of everything yourself.
When I emigrated from Germany to the Netherlands as a child, we had a two-week holiday in the Netherlands. That gave me a certain idea of what to expect. You can't quite compare it, but at least you've already been there. At least for me as a child that was reassuring, because I had a rather wild fantasy for a 10-year-old. It was different for my parents, they got completely different impressions and knew what to take into account.
When we decided to emigrate as a family, we took the plunge without ever having been in the country. However, my parents had traveled three months before us and that was close. They bought a house that we could all live in (strongly not recommended!) and kept us informed about everything via the internet. I also strongly advise against this, although in all honesty I must say that everything turned out well.
Once you've made the choice, the real work really begins. A move with children can be quite stressful, an emigration can cause real headaches. By the way, I have to make a comment here:the younger children are, the easier it is. My children went to preschool and kindergarten at the time of emigration. A new environment makes an impression, but it is also very exciting.
For myself, the transition was greater when I emigrated as a child. You lose your familiar surroundings. You have to leave your friends from school behind. You suddenly have to learn a completely different language (unless you live in the same language area). Suddenly you have to get rid of toys, because not everything can go with you… And so there are many more things that come to you as a child.
The younger the children, the easier it is to make the transition to another country. Until the age of 7 it will hardly cause any problems. The transfer to another school will not cause any problems either.
After that, I would advise against it, unless you are assured of a good connection in terms of school level. If a child is in the 6th grade (age 11 or 12 years), emigration could be considered again. Your child is already making the transition from primary to secondary education and that makes it just that little bit easier. The following also applies here:make sure that the connection in education is good.
Emigration during secondary school can cause problems, unless your child can continue to attend Dutch secondary education. Then the transition isn't that big. In other cases, you must coordinate the transfer with the local institutes, so that your child can connect and the educational process is not interrupted.
I would like to point out that Dutch education is quite well regarded. In many cases, the switch will not be that difficult. However, this does not apply if you are thinking of remigrating. For example, if your child has followed local education, it can be difficult to connect. Even with an international education, it can become difficult to get further education at the desired level. There are special institutions that can help you if you are thinking about remigrating with children who want to study in the Netherlands.
Small update:we have now remigrated and are running into a lot of problems. For a long time this was inexplicable to me, except that we couldn't get used to it here (not the children and neither did I). Fortunately, I have now found out why this is:both the children and myself are a third culture kid. This term is also known as global nomads and trans culture kids.
A third culture kid is a child who grows up in a culture different from that of their parents. These children grow up in the original culture of the parents and of course the culture of the new country of residence. These two cultures merge into a new so-called third culture. This was already the case for me when I emigrated from Germany to the Netherlands. For my children when they emigrated from the Netherlands to Suriname.
Although we all have a Dutch passport, getting used to the Dutch culture appears to be a problem. My daughter describes this as follows:I am white on the outside, but I am dark on the inside (Surinamese). I don't understand the culture here and people don't understand me.
I can understand her very well in this, although I was an adult when I emigrated to Suriname, I had already emigrated. I was then able to adapt to the Dutch culture. In Suriname I have again adapted to the culture with my own twist and now I no longer feel at home in the Dutch culture. This is difficult to put into words, but certainly something to keep in mind when emigrating and returning home. In our case, the transition has been a real shock and has even made us consider whether we want to stay here.
