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Change in your sex life after having children

The flames used to explode, but nowadays there is little left of it. How is your sex life? Which sex life? I feel guilty but dare not take any further steps.

A few years ago I ran into my boyfriend at work. For me it was not immediately love at first sight, but I immediately felt very attracted.
His eyes, his smile and especially the sociability and how he can talk about everything that is dear to him.
Van one thing led to another and we secretly agreed. After that first date, I was immediately sold. So caring and sweet that he was. We had a lot of fun, it really clicked!

Not much later we end up in bed and a little later we were officially in a relationship.
There was really nothing to complain about our intimacy. Several times a day, always good, always fun, sometimes romantic, sometimes not at all, real fanatics 😉 !

Change in our sex life after childbirth

Now I miss that time, even if my boyfriend doesn't believe it, because in his eyes I'm the one who never makes sense. And that is partly true. If only I knew what it was!
I still find him attractive, I love him very much and I still really want to. But somehow I can't bring myself to do it, and that actually started when we had our first child.

It sounds like such a stupid standard excuse, but really, I'm so tired at night, glad I can sleep. Then I want to cuddle and lie against him, but that's all I need.
I'd rather fall asleep like this. Do I not feel like it then? Yes, but I'm too tired for it and think it's too much hassle or something?
I don't know myself that way at all! I really liked it, nothing was too crazy. What's wrong with me and our sex life?

Pain in your stomach during sex

What I have to say is that it often hurts my stomach and nowadays it is so that I am already afraid of it beforehand, which in turn causes me to drop out.
If I decide to continue anyway it gets really annoying. In this way the circle is of course only maintained.

Sometimes I say to myself, come on girl don't introduce yourself and go with that banana. Then at least do it for your guy. But that doesn't feel good, less pleasant, not fair and more of a must than actually enjoying. Not only do I want to like it again for him but also for myself!

You understand that there is often tension or irritation about this at home. Especially with my boyfriend of course. And I understand that so well! But I simply don't know what to do, or maybe I know, but don't dare; enlist the help of a professional.

It could well be that something from the past is at the root of this.
Maybe the pain is between my ears and I'm too tense because of it. I do believe that I should take a step to a sexologist. But I'm scared.
What's she going to say, what should I do, won't it get embarrassing? Will I soon have to get to know my body, in the presence of someone else? Do you know much. Scary.

I'm going to look for the naughty girl inside again, because honey, I still am! Do you recognize the change in your sex life after having children?