There are discussions about this in our group of friends. Is tracking your child on his or her mobile now unethical or is it just wise to do so? Opinions are very divided on this and probably not only among our friends, but also among you. I have my own opinion about this (obviously):Tracking your child via his or her phone is just really smart and I don't think it's useful if you don't do this.
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Keeping track of your child's location over the phone is a no-brainer as far as I'm concerned. At this time, I think that if you want to give your child more independence little by little, you should do so in an acceptable way. A way that ensures that the risks remain as small as possible, but that your child still gets the freedom. Freedom to develop oneself and crawl out from under the parental wings. They call that letting go of your child. But in the safest way possible. As far as I'm concerned, tracking our kid's phone is part of that.
Of course it is not the case that we just keep an eye on the location without discussing it. We discussed together why we think it is so important that we - especially our son - can follow via his mobile. You know, it all starts with parental controls when your kids are just getting started on a cellphone or on a tablet. Even then you would like to keep an eye on what is happening and whether it is being done in a responsible manner. As your child gets older, you allow them more freedom in their mobile actions. Especially when they reach puberty like our oldest. I'm not going to tell him what he can or can't see on his cell phone. Of course not. Sometimes we can still open the conversation about that.
But in the context of 'choose your battles' I think it is much more important that we know where he is. And by that I don't mean that I want to know if he hangs out with Bakker Bart after school. Or that he really cycles to the Mac with his friends to 'chappen a Maccie' together, as they say. No, I think it is important to follow our child via his mobile when it comes to the more exciting moments. There comes a time when you have to let go of your child more and more. It starts with leaving your child at home alone, but then comes the moment that your child leaves you at home alone.
We have now reached the point where Mr. likes to get on his bike to chill out with his friends for an evening. All nice and nice, but sometimes he also has to cycle a long way home in the dark. We have indicated that we are fine with that, provided that he shares his location with us and cycles with someone else. We follow his mobile to have more certainty at moments that are less obvious.
After that evening chilling in a neighborhood village, it is still a short bike ride home. So in the dark. And it sometimes happens that we are already in bed by then. Of course we agree that he cycles with a friend and also the time that he has to be home. But even then the agreement is that he texts us when he leaves and comes home. Then I also know what time he will be home approximately. Or should be at home. And if it takes too long, then it's very nice to know where he is.
Suppose something happens along the way. If you have no idea where your child is, you can of course call. But if for whatever reason your child cannot answer his mobile, it is very nice if you can follow and trace him. It's just an extra bit of security.
The 'counterparty' finds it unethical. “In the past, our parents didn't know where we were either” is the argument. Yes, I know a few of those. I used to be able to skip school without my parents knowing right away. That's right. But whether that made me so much better. And today times are just different. So much can go wrong; an accident has happened in no time and there are also people walking around who want harm. I really don't want to think about it. And do you know what it is? As long as you just make it negotiable, what's wrong with it?
Can't you just explain to your child that you would like to be able to see where he or she is in the event of an emergency? Or where at least the telephone was last signaled? I will be the last person to continuously track my child online via his mobile phone. What good is that? I have something else to do. But if necessary, I can follow my child via his mobile. And that gives some peace of mind. It is a fact that it does not work completely conclusively. But it's better than nothing. Are you looking for an app that allows you to track your child on his phone? With these apps you can get started.
As long as you don't secretly turn on location sharing, but just decide together that it's nice to do that, there's nothing wrong with it as far as I'm concerned. What would you do?
