It's the Week Against Child Abuse. Attention to this is important if you consider that among all children in the class of your child(ren) there is on average 1 child who is abused and/or neglected. That's terrible isn't it?! That is why Taskforce Child Abuse and Sexual Abuse is launching the campaign #ikkijknietweg.
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Just to get straight to the point, some more shocking facts. Every year, 119,000 children are abused, half of which are not even known to the aid agencies.
The number of abused children per 1000 children:
0.8 Sexual abuse
4.7 Physical abuse
3.6 Emotional/psychological abuse
8.1 Physical neglect
8.4 Emotional/psychological neglect
Add the sum, and you realize that far too many children are victims of violence and neglect. Too many children who are beaten, verbally abused, ignored, neglected or abused. Or witness domestic violence and name-calling. Love and security is such a great thing for growing children. The consequences for these damaged children are often incalculable. The risk of mental disorders is high, as is the continuation of the same behavior. After all, learned young is done old. Preventing or taking timely action in the event of abuse is therefore of vital importance. Chairman Van Der Laan advocates a compulsory parenting course for expectant parents. Is that a solution? Or is that going too far? Education has many roads and long paths.
That is difficult to recognize unless you see it happening or the child indicates it directly or indirectly. Signs of child abuse to watch out for are:
Mind you, every situation is unique. Several factors influence the risk of domestic violence. But prejudice is easy. Abuse and neglect occurs in families with both highly educated and less educated parents. Make no mistake. Be alert, remain honest and act appropriately.
The figures do not lie:half of the abused children are not even known to the aid agencies. How lonely will these children feel? On the other hand, it can also be difficult for an outsider to report it. Because yes, what are the consequences? For the child, for the family, for the environment?
Someone once confided in me and said he saw a child being punched in the face by her father. It concerned a family known to friends of theirs. It bothered him enormously, was afraid that a link would be made to him when a report came. There was a chance that the father had seen him at the time of the incident. To this day I have no idea who it was. I did, however, obtain information for him at school, because I thought that something should at least be reported somewhere.
You just can't and shouldn't look away! And you know what scared me? That the teacher (for 40 years in the profession) was not even surprised by my story and immediately had an answer ready. Then you wonder:how often do they have to deal with this? With about 500 children in school, I fear this answer too.
Do you suspect that a child's well-being is at stake? Do you recognize signals or do you have a strong gut feeling about a certain child or family? Make it negotiable. Whether it is with the parents, with the teacher or with a confidential adviser. State what you notice about the child without being directly accusatory, unless you witness an incident as in the example. It is therefore not a presumption.
Be there for the child, be ready with a listening ear and ask if you can help them. But don't ask specifically because children are often, despite everything, loyal to their parents.
I think the best advice is:contact Veilig Thuis on 0800-2000 (free of charge and possibly anonymously) † A counselor is available 24/7 for your story and expert advice on how to act. Even when things are not going well in your own family. Also check out the Safe Home site for more information and tips.
One report can change the life of an abused child forever. Don't look back, take action. The well-being of a child must always come first!
Because it does not stop, not by itself…
